Breakfast with your friends

I got to work at 7:50 on Saturday to try and catch up with the book keeping and do payroll. Bill and Natashia came by around 10 and decided we would go and have breakfast at Mr. Wills. As Tashia is driving us to breakfast she announces, "I am kidnapping y'all. After breakfast, we are going to the blood center to donate blood for my mother." I am feeling generous and say, "Ok, that will be great." Tashia buys us a hearty breakfast of biscuits, sausage, eggs, and homefries and takes us to the Blood Center.

I am trying to remain calm since the last time I went to give blood, my pulse rate was too high. I guess I was nervous then, because 15 years ago when I gave blood the first time I had a big bruise on my arm and I passed out in the shower.

Well, the "nurse" comes out and says who would like to go first. "I will" (lets get this over with I am thinking) she takes me into a private room and pricks my finger (I always dread this because it hurts like hell to have your finger pricked), they have this new thing that does it fast and it doesn't hurt at all. Then I answer the fifty questions about sex with men having sex with men in Borneo and I am taken to the chair.

"Which arm do you prefer?" I have no idea so she says, "I will check both for the best arm." The sadistic woman then puts a band on my arm and pulls tightly throwing all of her weight into it. I am gasping in pain. She rubs on my arm to find the vein and says, "Let's try the other arm" I am thinking God, once is enough. She puts the band on the other arm and throws her weight into it again. I am trying not to gasp in pain. She quickly decides to go back to the first arm and apply the third tourniquet of terror. The band goes on and she pulls down on the strap so hard she is squatting on the floor as she fastens it.

I am in mortal pain thinking "Oh God this hurts" and trying to remain calm.

She rubs and pats on my arm where the vein is and says "now we just have to get this vein back up." I am grimacing because my arm is being severed by the tourniquet. She gets this iodine stick and pushes it really hard into the place where my vein is. It feels like I have been punctured. Then she does it again, she is apparently making an impression on my skin where she will stick the needle.

Tashia looks at me and says, "It's going to be OK Lisa" I smile and think about when it will be over.

Finally, Nurse Ratchett picks up the needle and inserts it. My arm is already in so much pain that a needle prick is nothing. She adjusts the needle a few times and finally releases the tourniquet. I squeeze the ball and watch Will and Grace on the TV. After crappy juice and cookies and the offer of a free calendar we all leave and go to the Condo and take a nap.

Two days later I still have a bruise from the tourniquet, deep muscle pain, needle marks, and a bruise around the vein. I am NEVER donating my blood again.