She doesn't work here anymore!

A former employee, you know who you are, stopped by the office today to get her final paycheck. Boss Man comes in and begins asking her about this case and that case and when she can do this and when she can do that. She tells him she is way too busy finishing her last semester at school.

A few minutes later, BM says, "Where's ________?"
I said, "She doesn't work here anymore."
He seemed astonished and said something to the effect of we need her here, noone else can do this stuff, how could she leave us in the lurch.

She told him in September he needed to replace her, she tried to train two other people to replace her (who didn't work out for whatever reason) and finally gave her notice. She hasn't worked here for two weeks.

Happy Thanksgiving

Greetings from Dallas!

Today started off with a bang. Waffles for breakfast and then family argument 1) Where is Aunt Georgia spending Thanksgiving? Georgia - "I just said I was invited to spend it with Jason and Maria, I didn't say I was going to go." Pops - "Ah hell, she said she was going to Jason's and I said, 'well good for you'. If you hadn't called her, we would have left her behind." After we determined that Georgia was indeed going to lunch with us we headed to Cracker Barrel for our traditional mediocre Thanksgiving lunch. The restaurant was crowded with lazy people who don't cook and the usual nasty smokers who ruin every family restaurant in Texas.
Later today, after the Cowboys lost spectacularly, came family argument 2) Pops controls the TV, "If Bill wants to watch Survivor, he can go in the back bedroom, so what should we watch Lisa?"
And finally after cherry pie, pizza, and pecan pie came family argument 3) "Lisa are you going to eat all night? I don't want the kitchen dirty late, I have to turn on the dishwasher and you don't know how."

God I love my family, they make life so much fun. Next year we are having thanksgiving in Nacogdoches. Bill and I will prepare all of the food and everyone can just show up. We will get satellite and several TVs just for that day so no one has to go to a back bedroom. Aunt Georgia has already been invited. Katie and Scott can do the dishes.

I get no respect!

"I like Natashia, Natashia is nice, but Lisa gets in your face, she would tell a cow how to eat the cabbage" - Boss Man

I am doomed to be the bossy mean one. I think it is because I am a tall brunette who looks you in the eye and speaks plainly. Natashia is tiny and has light brown hair, she even has a sweet voice and she makes chocolated chip cookies and remembers peoples birthdays. but I know the truth, she is ruthless. She is also one of my best friends.

Our Endless Numbered Days

I really like this CD by Iron and Wine. It sounds like Cymbalta makes me feel. Relaxed, happy and optimistic, while real life is still happening around me.

The Old Lisa is Back!

I missed my Altace and my Cymbalta this weekend. As a result, the cynical, angry, aggressive version of me reared her ugly head. I was behind one of those super cautious annoying drivers who stop on yellow arrows on East Starr. In a red haze, I zoomed past them on the left (wrong side of the road) and turned left onto Mound Street. It felt soo good. I continued muttering obscenities under my breath as I got behind another cautious person going 17mph in a school zone. God, you can go 20, I don't think you're going to kill anyone. I have also had flashes of insight such as, "this horror is the way life really is, the drugs just make everything rosy," as well as, "its a conspiracy, the drugs make me docile and willing to conform to the strictures of corporate America."

I have missed 1 1/2 days of work trying to get my insanity under control. Boss Man's voice alone makes my skin crawl. I am finally calming down a bit. I went to my "therapy" appointment today (even though it isn't until the week after Thanksgiving) and relaxed and read a book for a while.

Black Licorice

I took the Icelandic gift of black licorice to work to share with my colleagues. I passed out pieces of the delicate candy, one piece stuffed with marzipan and shaped like a tootsie roll and a piece of the more traditional rope licorice.

Moses popped it in his mouth, chewed, swallowed and said, "It's all right."

Sarita took a tentative bite of the rope licorice. Apparently her mouth began to cramp badly because she was forced to spit the repulsive candy in the trash can. She tried the marzipan and licorice next. She said this one was even worse.

Travis tried the candy and stated, "It tastes like ass."

I couldn't agree more.

Since Elvira searches my desk daily for candy, she had already tried it. Ha Ha, serves her right.

I woke up screaming in pain because of a massive leg cramp. What a way to start the day!

I need to find a new job, but I don't want to make the effort. I really don't want a traditional job. I don't like sitting at a desk all day with no windows to look out.

I want to be an artist. I am an artist.

I want to have a cup of coffee in the mornings as I sketch out and research my ideas. I want to experience the joy and pain of unloading kilns full of beauty and crap. I like to see my work displayed lovingly in someone's home, or worn to a special occasion.

I love to watch people when they look at my work. Whether they smile or frown, I like to see a reaction.

Instead, I am a paralegal in a personal injury law firm. I still have a sketchbook, just not time actually create what I am thinking about. I will change this. I will move forward. I will be an artist.

Superman or Green Lantern ain't got a-nothin' on me
I can make like a turtle and dive for pearls in the sea
-Donovan

Time

"We need to file these lawsuits ahead of time...probably"
-Boss Man

"We will sell no wine before it's time"
-Earnest and Julio Gallo

"We will file no lawsuit before it's time"
-Boss Man

Animal Quotes

"I'm straining an ant and swallowing a camel."
"These are not big cases, these are ants that are biting me around the ankle."
"Tight as a duck's butt."
"The steps in the forestry building are slicker than owl poop. I almost busted my ass."
"This squirrel has jumped three trees and there's no getting a shot at it now."

-Boss Man, proud owner of a Master's Degree in English

Quotes for the Day

"We've got to hang in here and fly this thing."
"I'll be a co-pilot instead of a passenger this time."
"I need a parachute, I need to to jump out of this airplane."

-Boss Man (overheard in a staff meeting)